Revived

I have to admit that for most of this past weekend I carried a bad attitude with me where ever I went. I wanted nothing to do with leadership or growing myself and family. I just wanted to give up on our journey and surrender. I felt like God had dropped us off in this place and said, have fun I will be back in awhile! I felt like no matter how hard I tried to get to a point , the further the point became. I was mad at God and really mad at myself. I was mad because I had wasted so much of my time focusing on trying to become this man that I may not have been created to be. I was searching in so many places to find some kind of significance. I thought if I could just find something that makes me feel like I am worth something. If I could just be really great at this than I know that I will be something. I know I could make an impact. I have spent so much time trying to fill this need in me to become something great. I know that it is something God has promised me. My problem is that I was not allowing God to work the greatness into me. I was expecting to just become this really influential leader and this really great person just because God promised me. I was not at that point of being willing to pay the cost of becoming a leader. Vince Lombardi said, "Leaders are made they are not born. They are made by HARD effort, which is the price all of us must pay to achieve anything worthwhile." That word "hard" is not always welcome in my vocabulary. It is one thing that I am working on in the process of becoming ALL that God has called me to!